Site additions and fixes

We have added a couple of things to help you.

The first is our list of current resources – the books we are using during the current teaching arc. We are meshing all these resources into our weekly lessons, and we encourage you to read the original works. (Full disclosure: the links will take you to If you purchase any of these items through these links, we get a very small referral fee.)

The second thing we have done is to add the class notes to each of the last two posts. These are the same notes that we hand out in class. You can download them and follow along as you listen.

New year, new topic – Good Fences!

Does it ever seem like someone left the door to your life open and a bunch of craziness came in? Do you ever wonder if you’re saying yes to something you should refuse – or saying no when you should say yes? Does it ever feel like other people have more control of your life than you do?

Join us beginning January 3, 2010 as we begin a new subject – Good Fences: Keeping the Crazies Out, Letting the Friendlies In.

Good fences don’t only make good neighbors, they make good parents, good spouses, and good friends.

We will focus on the choices and decisions that need to be made to make our relationships healthy and loving. We will discuss when it’s okay to say no – and when we should say yes. We will explore the impact these choices have on all the relationships we experience.

We hope you join us in person to enjoy the camaraderie of class time. If you can’t make it, the class will be podcast here each week, and you can join the conversation online. You can also submit your comments and questions to our Facebook page.

We look forward to seeing and hearing from you!

Follow-up to Entry053

Part of the reason for this blog is having the opportunity to discuss some of what happens in class. Though it doesn’t happen often, it would be nice to be able to have discussion over and above the limited time we have available on Sunday mornings.

In our class yesterday, we talked about Mark Gungor’s teaching on “going back for the girl”. Gungor told about the need every man has to boldly enter their world, pursue their dreams, and conquer their tasks. His main point was that men needed to do that, but it is far more important to remember the needs of their wife and not sacrifice marriage and family in pursuit of their ambitions.

Following his teaching, I talked about confidence, and the confidence that comes from being chosen.

Why was I stuck on confidence?

If you remember, Gungor talked about how Adam had failed in the garden of Eden. He said that Adam, given the chance to speak up and protect Eve and drive out Satan, had instead remained silent and done nothing. Gungor said – rightly so – that this was cowardice of a type that affects many men who are too afraid to speak up and get involved with their family.

To me, that’s an issue of confidence. Men – who are perfectly confident in business and work situations – become wimpy and weak in relational situations.

This failure to be confident drives insecure behavior, as it always does. Out of their insecurity, men retreat into their work-world, and don’t “go back for the girl.”

What it really takes to “go back for the girl” is confidence. And what it really means to “go back for the girl” is choosing her. When you put your “puking little life” aside and choose to spend time and affection and emotion and energy on her, you are saying, “I choose you more than anything or anyone else.”

In turn, choosing her helps give her the confidence she needs. It says that she is worthwhile and important and strong. Being chosen brings confidence.

What do you think? Does this make sense to you?

Welcome back…

If you’ve visited Wiilationships before, you will quickly recognize that all of our old content is missing. This is a result of a change in hosting providers, a lack of quality backup and a bit too much speed as we went round the learning curve.

At some point we may post all our previous recordings, but for now, join us as we pick up our new subject, “Dealing with Difficult People.” We hope to see you here often.